You tell Santa the union wants the elves to get free Santa’s Workshop swag. Because the greatest gift of all is a plastic water bottle your employer slapped the company logo onto.

“Okay,” Santa relents. “I’ll get a bunch of logo t-shirts made, but everyone’s getting the same size. If it doesn’t fit, then it’s not a t-shirt, it’s a dish rag with sleeves.”

Santa’s Rage: +5

• If Santa’s Rage is over 100, click here.
• If you want to end negotiations, click here.
• Otherwise, return to the email and make more demands. How many can you get?