You were not prepared to encounter a ghost hot dog eating contest in your rental home. There are many useful items in your suitcases, like changes of clothes, a toothbrush, a first aid kit, a pack of Cheesecake Explosion Oreos that’s been in the pantry for months, a Ouiji board, a phone charger, and…

That’s when you remember the Ouiji board you brought to Adult Board Game Sleepover Camp that no one wanted to play and you forgot to unpack. Perhaps you could communicate with the ghosts and nicely tell them to get the hell out.

After setting up the Ouiji board in the living room, you ask out loud, “Will you ghosts please leave? I rented this place for the week.” The ghost referee guides your hands letter-by-letter to spell out the answer.

Y-E-S–B-U-T–O-N-L-Y–I-F–Y-O-U–C-A-N–B-E-A-T–V-I-N-N-Y–W-I-M-P-L-E

So it’s you versus Vinny “The Dead Digester” Wimple in a hot dog eating contest. Of course, you’ve never competed professionally before, so Vinny Wimple – a champion in every sense of the word – out eats you, but the ghosts respect your amateur effort. They wrap things up a few hours early, leaving you with an unforgettable memory and hot dog-induced indigestion.

THE END