You hold the key in your hand. It shines under the floodlights of Shecky’s car lot, as you walk toward the cursed Camaro.

You take a deep breath and open the driver’s side door. As you sit inside, the car growls at you. When you start the ignition, the Camaro bursts forward, going from 0 to 60 mph in mere seconds!

The Camaro immediately crashes into Shecky’s trailer! Your head hits the steering wheel hard, but you’re still alive – theoretically – as the cursed car slowly backs up. Through the shattered glass, you see pieces of the destroyed trailer scattered across the lot. His possessions – yellowing copies of TV Guide, a box of “Cubin’” cigars, IOUs written on the backs of other IOUs – scatter to the wind.

“My life?” Shecky woozily observes. “It ain’t goin’ so great…”

You pass out looking at the face of Vinnie Barbarino on TV Guide, who is kind of smiling at you. He’s being cool about it, but it’s a smile.

THE END