You inhale the monster’s tasty glop, slowly performing the breaststroke as you do. However, you forget to inhale any of those all-important air pockets. You just drink, and get dizzy, and drink, and throw up devil horns, and drink, and lose consciousness, and, well, uhhh… 

The next year, a bronze statue of you is erected in the town square. It reads: “Died defending our village. Attempted to drink a monster. Pretty darn cool.”  

THE END