You arrive at home early Christmas morning. As you shed your hat and coat in the living room, your partner notes that you look very different from when you left a week ago. What’s with the long… fake white beard and the big… fake belly? You explain that the belly’s permanent, the beard is fashionable, and what you’re about to do is so real it’s surreal, so get the kids in here. And start recording. You use your body manipulation ability to shove yourself into tight spaces, like the area between the fridge and the stove, and in-and-out of the cereal cabinet. Under your breath, you curse your home’s designer for not putting in a fireplace.

Your family is amazed and proud of you. They’d be even happier if Christmas wasn’t officially canceled, but it’s still an amazing display.

THE END